Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Putting Together The Pieces

Portraits take time to paint. I'm sure we can all think of a portrait of some famous person that becomes "the" image of that person. One portrait that comes to my mind is of George Washington. Since I've never seen George Washington in the flesh, my understanding of what he looked like was through his portraits. A portrait is a construction, brush strokes that have coalesced into a whole picture that represents something.



The past few weeks I have worked on a portrait in some sense. The portrait is not a painting, but rather a collection of events from a year in the life of my Grandmother. A year is not much in respects to a lifetime. I see it as a brush stroke in a life that was fruitful and full of stories and events. By focusing on one year, I have found that a lifetime of events has boiled up. When I think of the times that I have had with my Grandmother and the year that is being examined I can't help but think of how mysterious life can be.

I do feel that life is very much a fleeting thing. One day we can be wrapped up in so many things or even wrapped up in one event that those things and events become all we know. But then the next day everything can be gone. Or even, everything that we thought was important is no longer of value. As I put together the pieces of a year I think I'm really trying to understand how some pieces fit into a greater story. The more I do this, the more perspective I gain. Every life is different, just as a portrait and the brush strokes that make up the portrait. What portrait are you painting? What greater story is your portrait telling?

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

The Silent March of History

If you stand for me
You may be disappointed
When the words that are spoken
Disconnects the hearts of listeners

Passive ears tingle
And the shifting of weight
The growing uncomfortableness

These
The precursor
To the silent march of history
Not away from you
But away from me

Grace
Sufficient Grace
Thorns and briers
For strength
Not for me
But for you

Sunday, September 26, 2010

For those few followers

I wanted to let those who follow, not that I'm leading anyone anywhere, that I have decided to create a second blog all about films. Partly so I can continue to work on my chops with writing but also to fully devote a space to film. The Band of Outsiders blog is more of a personal open forum of ideas and can be very scattered. Just look at previous posts.

But here is the link to the new place Light Through the Mirror

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Salesman

Nineteen sixty-eight was a year that many historians of the United States of America see as a turning point in the country's history. Even in the world of Hollywood filmmaking, nineteen sixty-eight saw seminal pieces of work that supported the changing landscape of the culture. Films such as; 2001: A Space Odyssey (Kubrick), Night of the Living Dead (Romero), Rosemary's Baby (Polanski, Head (Rafelson), Faces (Cassavetes), and many more. These films not only showed the changing landscape of American culture, (some argue the rise of youth culture, others the change from modernism to post-modernism) but also the philosophical and psychological shift in the representation of characters within the films. The general tone and feel of many films in the sixties seemed to personify the difficulties of accepting the "establishment" and the separation of generations seemed to show the gulf that was growing between young and old.



The documentary film Salesman (Maysles Brothers, 1968) supports the philosophical change in the American psyche that was prevalent in the nineteen sixties. Salesman, though, shows the pressure of working class salesmen who struggle for financial security. In filmmaking the classical Hollywood big spectacle films offered much in the way of surface appeal. You knew who the characters were and how they would face the challenges that arose in the film. As independents and young film makers infiltrated Hollywood, characters became more complex, and doubt, fear and failure became traits of the hero's in some films. That's if the film even had a hero. Salesman has no hero but ever presently convey's the doubts, fears and failure that comes with selling door to door.

Now I'm sure for those who are of the documentary mindset, Salesman is no mystery. But in comparison to the fiction films of nineteen sixty-eight, Salesman seems other worldly. Maybe it is because of the film stock, the black and white film stock doesn't have the flare of even George Romero's Night of the Living Dead. Or maybe that other worldliness comes from the fact that the filmmakers follow salesmen who look so unexciting, and don't have the counter culture representation or even appeal as say the characters in Bob Rafelson's Head. But there is something that Salesman has that many of the popular films of nineteen sixty-eight doesn't have and that's reality.

Salesman centers around four main Bible salesman, one in particular Paul Brennan, nicknamed "The Badger".

It is his story within the films body that seems to be the center piece. Paul's visits to various houses and attempts at selling a highly ornamented catholic bible are wrought with failure and a half hearted attempt at trying to make a sale. Paul's failures are mixed with other salesmen's success. In one day of selling Paul has no success and at the end of the day he is asked how the battle went? He talks about the day while his fellow salesman watches a boxing match on television. In a way Paul is broken down fighter. He says he used everything he had to try and sell but nothing happened. Paul acknowledges that the business is on the fringe but it is not the business. It is Paul that teeters on the fringe, with each failure he comes closer and closer to breaking. The Maysle brothers capture each failure and the build up tension with close ups of Paul that seem to bottle the anger, disappointment and resignation that Paul vocalizes among his fellow salesman at the end of the day.




From the outset of the film the pressure to sell the Bibles is evident. Excuses are made by Paul about the territory that the salesman are selling in. When addressing an assembly of the salesmen, the general manager chides the salesmen as being the reason for any rejection of a sale. In one sequence as Paul travels by train to the Chicago sales meeting his journey is intercut with fellow salesman pridefully exuding themselves.


At the sales meeting the salesmen are told that they are doing God's work by selling Bibles. The evidence of their work is spiritually lacking and catholicism is used as a tool to try and sell Bibles and Encyclopedias. It seems that the only higher authority that they are working for is a financial deity. The salesmen use the differences between Irish catholics and other european catholics to try and find ways to exploit the consumers emotions. Along with pandering to potential buyers, using two salesman to make a sale, or incessantly pushing the product to create guilt.

One sequence of the film has two of the salesmen using as much spin to sell the Bible to a family that cannot afford the cost. The wife of the family wants the Bible but knows that the cost is out of reach. The salesmen do whatever they can in getting a small down payment. Later in the film Paul visits the poor family and lies about his position as a district manager and then creates a story about penalizing the processor of the order to get money out of the wife of the poor family.


What follows is Paul changing a flat tire. The flat tire is a minor inconvenience compared to making a sale but I can't help but see the flat tire as a symbol for the extent that Paul will go to make a dollar. He roles the tire down a hill and laughs. Paul is no different from the tire, he's used and blown out, his job is a joke and the pressure of selling is too much to take. After a terrible work day he vents about selling and believes he has all of the reasons why people buy and don't buy the Bible. His fellow co-workers treat him as if he is a leper, it is as if the lack of success could be contagious. Paul tags along on a potential sale and tries to help his fellow salesman. What happens is Paul being rejected and then used as selling device by his fellow worker to try and get a family to buy the Bible.


It's the last straw for Paul and he quits being a salesman. He try's to joke with his fellow workers but Paul's attempts are futile, instead of being funny he looks burned out and sounds incoherent.




In an interview the Maysles participated in about documentary they quoted about Salesman the verse from the Bible, "What profit a man if he gains the world yet loses his soul?" Paul is a man who knows that his soul is gone and traded for the dollar. He sings at one point in the film if I was a rich man, from Fiddler on the Roof. Paul is a real example of the malaise of living a life that is constantly striving for financial success. Many fictional films of the sixties portrayed characters with a dissatisfaction for established means of living, and characters looking for a freer way of life. The final blank stare that Paul gives in Salesman does not offer much in the way of hope for his future. The door to door sales business has passed him by, the emasculation of being a failure only leaves Paul with the possibility of retiring. But what is he retiring to? Of the landscape that we see in Salesman we see the harsh Massachusetts weather of winter. The broken down landscape via train when Paul goes to Chicago for the sales meeting and then finally the bazar world of Florida, with streets named after characters and places from Sinbad's Voyage and the houses residing eclectic residents. Paul is out of place, time and purpose.

Though time has progressed past the sixties and the days of door to door salesman with the nature that is represented in the film, Salesman still touches upon the challenge of trying to make a living. Grand philosophical and psychological words are never really spoken in Salesman but the film's content still seems to ask the question, "For what is our purpose, and why do we do what we do?" For every forlorn stare and moment of contemplation that seems to be a product of the environment in which we work, there is a bit of Paul within us. Maybe our souls were not meant for the whole world.

Wednesday, June 30, 2010

June 30: Closing The Book

So much time can be spent
Reading about things that happened
Though understanding and knowledge can be gained
You can't go back and do it again

In moments so brief
Observations ever changing
There needs to be a new chapter
So there can be a morning after

Turn the cover down
The book goes back on the shelf
Tales later to be spoken
One day the books to be open
When the soul passes on
Let the books
Reflect the songs
Of the years that are gone



This final song/poem bookends the month. This notebook can now be closed for a little while but there will probably be times will when I will open the blue notebook, read the words and reflect. There is not only a time to look back but a time to put the pen to the blank page.

Tuesday, June 29, 2010

June 29: Office Scene

Fluorescent bulbs
Blinding life out of the eyes
The cluttered desk
Pictures of happier times
High-heeled shoes teetering
One hand supporting
A brow partially covered
By strands of hair

The squeak of the chair
A click of the keyboard
Shuffled papers
The micro-sonic clench of the hand
The calendar met to cheer up
Marking numbers till the weekend

The inbox fills up
The clock marches on
The eyes shadowing discomfort
The heart beats for something more

Monday, June 28, 2010

June 28: A Question of Building

Who are the ones
That are going to build my house?
That question reaching inward
Yet making me reach out

Though the context may mean
Something very different
Your other words
Challenge me to make a difference

Give me a hammer
Give me some nails
I'll try to build upon
Something that will never fail
My skills may be limited
But your guidance will see me through
At the end of that work
It will all be for the glory of you

When you say, "Go,
Reach out to those rejected"
Work out of me
All the prejudice that'll make me ineffective

There shouldn't be a place
That I shouldn't bring a light to shine
Even though the threat is high
You say, "You're still mine"

So,
Give me a hammer
Give me some nails
I'll try to build upon
Something that will never fail
My skills may be limited
But your guidance will see me through
At the end of that work
It will all be for the glory of you

The work to be done
Is for so many
But the workers are few
Give strength to the minority
So the majority
Can give praise to you

Give me a hammer
Give me some nails
I'll try to build upon
Something that will never fail
My skills may be limited
But your guidance will see me through
At the end of that work
It will all be for the glory of you

Are you the one
That's going to build my house?